08 December 2009
All it took was a confrontation from a person, whom I'm not even close with, to make me realise all my wrongdoings. I've realised that my parents have been trying to talk to me about it and wanted me to change but I didn't heed their advice.
I was told I have a very bad attitude towards others and sometimes, whatever I say may hurt others, and all these are done by me unconsciously. There may be words that I've said that may be harsh and hurtful but truthfully, I really don't mean it. To everyone to whom I've hurt with hurtful words, i'm really truly sorry. From the botttom of my heart, I am really sorry for all the mean things that I may have said.
When I told Mama that someone confronted me about my really bad attitude, she said she had waited a long time for someone to come up and confront me about it. I've been doing this time and again while not realising it, because it is something which i have inherited. A behaviour that I have inherited from Papa. A type of behaviour where one would unconsciously say mean and hurtful things unconsciously, though we really don't mean it, and in the end, unconsciously hurting others. Which is also the reason how i got this garang character.
I was shocked to really hear this from Mama and i cried. I cried because I felt embarrassed that all this time, i've hurt so many people without realising it. I'm embarrassed because its true to what people say about how a person's personality reflects on how they are brought up by their family. I'm embarrassed because I didn't realise I've said so many mean things to others; my own family, my close friends, my colleagues.
It took me a while to absorb everything, but I've come to terms and made a conclusion. It's time for me to change. It's not going to be easy and I apologise for the next time I say mean things, but I'm really going to try my best to change. I will become a better person.
the world will turn WILD.
9:24 PM
